Okay, that’s not exactly true. We still have a few days before 2022 is upon us, so it stands to reason that I got my annual holiday review tradition. Sadly, I didn’t have access to any Christmas anime, nor did I think of listening to any Christmas albums. Then out of nowhere, a weird idea lit up in my head, and I decided to pursue said weird idea. The subject of today is actually a personal tradition of mine, as I’ve been playing this expansion to one of the most iconic FPS titles for over a decade. An expansion that, while certainly not the best that was made, still has the kind of character & personality that could only have come from the 1990s. So, load up your shotgun with the finest buckshot, put on your ugliest Christmas sweater, and enjoy my review for Duke: Nuclear Winter. Let’s begin!
Development History
And here is where things are rather strange for this expansion pack. The developer for Nuclear Winter, aka Simply Silly Software, has a background that is just bizarre. As stated by the Duke Nukem Wiki:
“Simply Silly Software is a development company that was probably established sometime in the 90's by Joe Wilcox and are one of the three companies to be involved with the Duke Nukem 3D expansions; the other two being WizardWorks and Sunstorm Interactive; both of which are now defunct. Simply Silly Software's most notable product is the 1997 Duke: Nuclear Winter expansion for Duke Nukem 3D. They also developed the D! frontend for Doom, Heretic, and Hexen, the Doom DeathManger replacement Doom/Master, the Doom/Heretic to Hexen pwad converter CONV2HEX and sold them to WizardWorks for inclusion on the D!ZONE and H!ZONE discs. They also deleloped the Shadow Warrior frontend Shuriken and the Blood network front-end, 'BloodBath'. Aside from developing Duke: Nuclear Winter and Duke Nukem, Doom, Heretic, and Hexen add-ons details on the company are scarce which is unusual considering they made an expansion for the immensely popular Duke Nukem 3D. Due to so little information being available it's unknown if the company still exists but they are most likely defunct as nothing has been heard from them since; however despite their inactivity unlike WizardWorks and Sunstorm Interactive there isn't any information to confirm if they are defunct or not.”
So that is the brief history of Simple Silly Software, As to how they got the job to make Nuclear Winter, I don’t know. As to how they were popular enough that 3D Realms contacted them for the job.....that’ll probably be one of gaming’s biggest mysteries.
In-Game Story
From the Duke Nukem wiki:
“Santa Claus has been captured and brainwashed by the aliens that Duke previously defeated. To make matters worse, the aliens are now supported by an enemy force calling themselves the Feminist Elven Militia. Duke Nukem must travel to the North Pole in order to stop the brainwashed Santa Claus and his manipulative captors.”
This is not a joke. That is the story of this expansion pack. The main game had a basic story, and Nuclear Winter is the same in that regard. It is a little tasteless with the inclusion of the “Feminist” elven militia (Calling them “Feminist” seems like a super cheap shot, despite there being absolutely no feminism in the game), but it’s pretty much harmless.
Gameplay
The gameplay is almost exactly the same as DN3D. Kill things, find keys for doors, look for secrets, complete simple puzzles, etc. However, Nuclear Winter introduces small subtle things that give the game a holiday touch. In addition to base enemies that have a seasonal makeover, there are 6 brand new enemies that you can only find in Nuclear Winter. 3 are fundamentally complete reskins of base enemies with tweaked attacks (The Frosted Battle Mobile are reskined Pig Cop Tanks, Flying Frosty is basically the Assault Commander if he was a snowman, and Santa Claus is a reskined Dukebot from multiplayer), but the other 3 are brand new. There are the Snowmen, who are stationary, but their snowball attack can distort your aim if you’re too close. Finally, there’s the Grunt & Groan elves of the militia. The Grunt wields dual machine guns (A rare variant that looks like the normal version uses rapid dual shrinkers instead), while the Groan is packing a shotgun (Weird sidenote: The Groan doesn’t wear pants). The Grunt & Groan introduce the perhaps the most interesting mechanic of Nuclear Winter, and that is the presents! The Grunt & Groan have a chance upon death to drop a present, and the content inside is random but helpful. It could be Pistol/Shotgun/Ripper ammo, armor, or health. I do love the fact that as you walk over a present, there’s a cute unwrapping sound, and while they don’t show up all the time, they can on occasion genuinely help a fight.
If there’s one big complaint I have, it’s with the opening levels. One of the biggest criticisms of Nuclear Winter is that the beginning levels are basically the 2nd & 1st levels of L.A. Meltdown, and you play through them backwards. This is most definitely a lazy move, as they fundamentally function like the base versions. There are some level changes here & there, but for the most part Deja Vu & Where It All Began are the exact same as Red Light District and Hollywood Holocaust.....just with a holiday coat of paint.
Another complaint, but much smaller in scale, would be the music. On the one hand, it’s exceptionally cute, and easily fits with the Christmas theme for incredibly obvious reasons. The problem is, the music isn’t exactly original to Nuclear Winter. From what little info is out there (Mostly from Civvie 11's 2018 Christmas Grabbag Video), the MIDI music files were taken from some Geocities website that were normally used for custom Doom WADs, and instead were used for this Duke expansion. It adds to the further “Lazy” feel of the whole package, but I give a hint of slack since the resources were already available.
Graphics
Duke: Nuclear Winter has basically the same graphics engine as DN3D, but with the addition of holiday themed textures & animations. The reskined enemies for the most part work, as do the brand new targets to take aim at. Everything else.......varies. Some of the textures work surprisingly well, but there are others that clash too much with the level design. There are also some snow textures brought in to make things more Christmas-ey, but if I recall correctly they came from a fanmade expansion released after DN3D. I’m not completely sure on that, so take it with a pinch of salt.
Other
If you’d like to see this expansion in action, then click on the link below:
Duke: Nuclear Winter (Walkthrough)
One other thing. Nuclear Winter, along with Duke It Out In D.C. & Duke Caribbean: Life’s A Beach is no longer available on Steam (Through the Megaton Edition), but it can still be found on Zoom-Platform's Duke Nukem 3D Atomic Edition. Though it’s unclear why Nuclear Winter didn’t get a re-release when World Tour came out, Duke It Out In D.C. & Duke Caribbean: Life’s A Beach didn’t come back because of so-called content in the expansions that was considered borderline "sexist and racist" by the publishing team. I will not open up that can of worms, since it’s close to the most wonderful day of the year, and I’m in good spirits. Ironically, despite being taken off Steam back in 2016, if you still had the Megaton Edition it was never taken away from your library.
Overall Impression & Rating
Duke: Nuclear Winter.......is definitely the worst out of the three expansion packs. This definitely feels rushed, lazy, and the few good things it does having going for it are rather flawed. In comparison to Duke It Out In D.C. & Duke Caribbean: Life’s A Beach, it’s rather hard to believe that Nuclear Winter was official. However, I can’t deny that I actually have a bit of fun when playing this. Sure, it’s not that great, but it’s become a personal Christmas tradition for me on Christmas Eve. Right before I go to bed, I load it up, and enjoy a little bit of seasonal mayhem before thinking of sugar plums dancing in my head. Nuclear Winter may not be good, but it is most definitely a curiosity that you should at least watch if you have the time.
Duke: Nuclear Winter gets a 6 out of 10, but it makes me smile as if it was an 8 out of 10.
And that was my review for Duke: Nuclear Winter, and by extent the last review of 2021. This was definitely a better year than the disease-ridden hellscape that was 2020, and while things were still rough, it was much easier to move through things. I’m taking a break for the next few weeks to celebrate the holidays with my folks, so have a Merry Chrismahanakwanzaa, and a Happy New Year! Let’s have an awesome 2022!
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If you want just the soundtrack, click on the link below:
Duke: Nuclear Winter OST
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